Rampaging forklift edition

A man in Freeport, Florida, was arrested last weekend for going on a rampage at a construction site for a liquor store, causing approximately $100,000 worth of damage.

The man stole a forklift from the site and used it to break through the fence surrounding the construction, then proceeded to wreck the site, damaging materials, scaffolding, a fire hydrant, a water meter, and more. Eyewitnesses reported to the police that they saw him “throwing cinder blocks off the scaffolding.”

When apprehended, the suspect gave his name as Alice Wonderland and said that he had been ordered to wreck the site by “a hookah-smoking caterpillar.”

Upon further questioning, the forklift-stealing vandal said he had a problem with the fact that the building being constructed was a liquor store.

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